


For the Love of Darwin

by greywing (ctrlx)



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Darwin the Tortoise, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-06
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-23 19:46:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1577330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ctrlx/pseuds/greywing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I present the exciting adventures of two scientists raising a tortoise!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Cosima?" Delphine poked her head through the doorway.

"Yeah?"

"Where is Darwin?"

Silence. Horror. "OH SHIT, I let him out to get a little free-range crawl time and then Sarah called and-- _oh my God, I left the doors open._ " Cosima looked up at Delphine helplessly. "I've lost our child! I'm a terrible mother!"

"He has to be somewhere inside," Delphine soothed her. She held out a hand. "Come on, let's find him."

"He's so small and quiet and that was _hours_ ago," Cosima muttered as she pushed herself disconsolately to her feet.

Delphine suppressed a smile. "Our home isn't that big or that scary, chérie."

Cosima shot her a glum glare. "That's not what you say when you tell me to pick up my things."

"Oh, that's true," Delphine gasped dramatically, "he may be tangled up and trapped in one of your bras by now! That red one. You know how he's drawn to red things."

For an uncomprehending second, Cosima gaped at her. Then, eyes narrowing and lips caught between a grimace and a smile, she pounced at Delphine, fingers crooked to tickle. Delphine let out a laughing shriek and danced away.

"Get over here!" Cosima growled.

"We have to find Darwin!" Delphine protested, grinning, darting into another room.

"'Our home isn't that big or scary,'" Cosima mimicked, chasing after her.

Delphine laughed and fended off Cosima's tickle attack, catching at Cosima's hands and wrists, breathlessly trying to remind her beloved that Darwin could be underfoot. 

"Okay, fine, but this isn't over," Cosima grumped.

"This wouldn't have started if you hadn't forgotten about Darwin," Delphine pointed out.

"Did you have to remind me?" Cosima groused.

"Yes, because I'm right," Delphine declared blithely, "and you should let me be right."

Cosima huffed to herself as they stepped into the living room and scanned the floor. She ruminated quietly for a second, then sighed. "Fine. Just this once."

"I love you, too," Delphine murmured and kissed her cheek. "Now let's find our tortoise."

*

"Hey, Darwin," Delphine overheard Cosima singing to the tortoise in his terrarium. "Did _maman_ Delphine feed you already?"

Seated on the couch with her laptop open upon her lap, Delphine turned her head slightly and called out, "Was I supposed to feed him?'

Heavy silence followed. "You didn't feed him?"

"No?" Delphine verified hesitantly.

"Delphine, you've been home for hours!" Cosima called back. "You should have fed him."

"I didn't know I was supposed to!" Delphine protested, not budging from her spot.

"Didn't you have any pets growing up?" Cosima pestered from a room away incredulously.

"No," Delphine said, mostly to herself, but Cosima sauntered into the room bearing the unfed-for-hours-even-though-Delphine-was-home tortoise in her hands.

"Really?" Cosima said. "A biologist who didn't have pets growing up?"

"Microbiologist," Delphine corrected her. The other scientist, the one of them who had apparently grown up with pets, carried herself and the tortoise to the inviting empty cushion next to Delphine. The blonde scooted over to make room for them. "A future microbiologist whose parents didn't like pets, so I didn't get to have one of my own." 

"Not even fish?" Cosima asked, tucking her feet up beneath her and placing Darwin, drawn up into his shell, beside her. They both peered at him hunkered protectively in his shell home.

"Not even fish," Delphine confirmed.

"Bummer," Cosima said. "Okay, so the first lesson is that we feed Darwin regularly. Whoever gets home first feeds him around dinner time. Deal?"

Delphine laughed, just as Darwin poked his head out and surveyed his new environment cautiously. "Okay. Deal. But you might have to remind me."

"Yeah, I remember the week I was gone and you didn't water the plants."

"Just that _one_ time," Delphine groaned. "You're never going to let me forget that, are you?"

"The orchid can't forget anymore," Cosima said drily, layering on the guilt.

"One time," Delphine muttered.

"But we'll remember to feed you, Darwin," Cosima crooned to the tortoise.

"Yes," Delphine agreed with a heavy sigh, "yes, we will."

But a moment later she caught Cosima's eye, the other woman smiling softly, affectionately, and her heart warmed and she smiled back.

*

The smell wafting through the compartments prepared Delphine for the sight of a joint smoking lazily between Cosima’s fingers—but perhaps not to find Cosima on the floor, on her back, clutching lettuce in her free hand, which she offered to the tortoise upon her belly.

"Cosima," Delphine said in a measured tone, "what are you doing?"

Cosima lifted her head and smiled up at her, unmindful of the small tortoise head that stretched out to nip bites out of the leaf dangling before it. “Oh, hey. Welcome home. Do you think tortoises can get high?”

"You mean off of secondhand marijuana smoke?" Delphine leaned against the doorframe. "Is that what you’re trying to find out?"

"No, but like, it occurred to me just now that Darwin could totally be getting baked with me."

"Mmm," Delphine hummed in noncommittal acknowledgement of Cosima’s words. "Are you planning to test this?"

Cosima’s eyes grew wide and round. “Like how would we even test that? How would we know he’s high?”

Delphine crossed her arms and contemplated Cosima for a long beat. “Okay, I’m going to give you a choice. You can feed Darwin and not fill his stomach or his lungs with cannabis, or you can stay here and think about how not all pot-fueled ideas are good ones and Darwin comes with me.”

Cosima snorted. “Not good? How do you think I got through my dissertation?”

Allowing a half-smile to curve a corner of her lips, Delphine stepped up to Cosima and crouched beside her. “With that big brain of yours.” She leaned down and pressed a kiss to Cosima’s forehead. “And this smart mouth,” she murmured and captured Cosima’s lips with her own, greeting her properly. A soft moan from Cosima’s throat and a slip of her tongue conveyed her approval. Pulling away, Delphine whispered, “Darwin’s coming with me.”

"Hey!" Cosima exclaimed, betrayed.

Delphine shrugged, scooping Darwin up and unfolding from her crouch.

"Will you at least come back and get baked with me?" Cosima asked forlornly.

"No," Delphine replied curtly. "Someone has to make dinner because _someone_ will be ravenous soon.”

"Ah, c’mon," Cosima cajoled as Delphine swept out of the room.

"No," Delphine insisted over her shoulder, voice carrying through the open door. "Add arguing with me to the list of pot-fueled ideas you should contemplate for their folly."

Cosima muttered under her breath.

"And no entertaining unkind thoughts about me," Delphine instructed even louder from farther off.

Frowning, Cosima placed the joint between her lips and took a pull, pondering suitable forms of retribution.

"And definitely," Delphine declared, whipping around the edge of the doorway and sticking her head into the room, "no thinking you can get revenge by doing something silly like withhold sex. Because we both know who would really suffer." She smiled at Cosima, arrested mid-puff. "Dinner should be ready in an hour."

With that Delphine ducked away. Cosima exhaled in a huff. She contemplated the ceiling.

After a moment she said, “Dammit,” then lay wondering what Delphine planned for dinner—and what she should plan for afterwards.

*

Delphine drifted thoughtlessly down the store aisle, her pace leisurely to match Cosima's unhurried one. Eyes drifting aimlessly from side to side, she took passing notice of an older woman's glance at Cosima's hand wrapped around hers, when that same hand tugged and dragged her toward a different direction. Delphine's attention jerked to alertness, especially when her mind registered the section they were entering.

"Why are we in the baby section?" Delphine asked, slightly alarmed. "Is there something you need to tell me?"

Cosima graced her with a smirk. "Oh, yeah, I'm totally preggers. Did I forget to mention that?"

Delphine huffed a little laugh and smiled, if a touch sadly. They had never really broached the subject of Cosima's infertility. It had never come up, actually. As far as Delphine could discern--having had no opportunity to ask--the consequence of her cloned nature didn't seem to sadden Cosima herself and, really, Delphine couldn't imagine fitting children into their current schedules. Which didn't answer--

"Are we looking for something?" Delphine asked.

"Just want to check something," Cosima assured her. Her fingers squeezed around Delphine's. Delphine relented. They wandered up an aisle and down another before Cosima stopped abruptly, scanning the shelves.

Delphine's expression turned quizzical. "Baby gates?"

"For Darwin," Cosima said, eyeing options and prices.

Delphine let that answer stew for a beat. "Why would we need a baby gate for Darwin?"

"So we can let him out to wander around but keep him in one room," Cosima said matter-of-factly.

"We can close the door," Delphine pointed out.

"Yeah, but we could keep him in one room while we're in another room and keep an eye on him," Cosima explained patiently.

"He's a tortoise," Delphine said at last. "For the time being a small tortoise. We have no stairs he can fall down. There's nowhere we have to worry about him getting into." Delphine paused to gauge Cosima's reaction, lips mashed together, not quite pursed into a pout. "I don't think we need a baby gate."

"It was just a thought," Cosima said blithely, turning away. She took a step but Delphine stood her ground and anchored her through their joined hands. Cosima pulled up short, surprised, and stumbled a step back. With a gentle yank Delphine carried Cosima into her body with the change in the smaller woman's momentum, free hand coming up to cup Cosima's cheek and lips darting down to brush against Cosima's.

"It was a good thought," she told her startled, bewildered beloved with a little smile, trailing her fingers along Cosima's jaw. "We just don't need gates. Okay?"

Cosima studied Delphine's face and then broke out into a sheepish smile. "Yeah. Okay." She took a deep, unobstructed breath--a phenomenon that filled Delphine with a warm reassurance--and exhaled the tension out of the set of her shoulders. "Do we need anything else?"

"Well," Delphine considered, "if we're not purchasing gates for Darwin, we could stop by the pet store. Would you like to?"

Cosima brightened. "Can we?"

Her enthusiasm almost made Delphine laugh but she merely smiled and flexed her grip on Cosima's hand tucked in hers. "Yes, why not?"


	2. Chapter 2

"So we're doing this. We're gonna move in together."

"Yes?" Delphine confirmed, punctuating her affirmation as a question at the last second. "If you're unsure now--"

"No, no, it's cool, it's cool." Cosima gazed off into the distance and wrapped her end of the blanket more securely around herself. Delphine resisted the reflex to check her temperature. Cosima tugged at the beanie snug upon her head--covering the first stubble of growth stubborn enough to come up in the wake of the treatments--and frowned thoughtfully at nothing. When she turned back, her eyes were bright. "Can we get a pet?"

"We haven't even decided where we're going to live!" Delphine exclaimed.

"Yeah, but if we know we're going to get a pet, we can tailor our search for places that will let us have pets," Cosima reasoned.

"Let's figure out where we want to go first," Delphine said gently. "I, for one, would like to get out of this cold."

*

"What would you like for your birthday?" Cosima asked. Delphine suspected the light in her eyes, the satisfaction of her smile. "A puppy?"

"What?"

"I would like to get you a puppy," Cosima declared simply.

Delphine laughed. "No."

"Why not?" whined Cosima. 

"Cosima," Delphine said, modulating the incredulity that had spurred her hasty denial, "we don't have time to take care of a puppy right now."

"How about a kitten? A soft little furball of happiness."

Delphine leveled Cosima with a look of admonishment. "We don't really have time for a kitten either. We travel too much--to go see Sarah and Alison and--"

"So then we'll have an excuse not to travel so much!" Cosima pointed out.

"Do you really think our schedules will be any less hectic because we adopt a pet?"

Cosima sighed. "Fine. What do you _actually_ want for your birthday, then?"

Delphine tilted her head. "Do you really want to know?"

"Yeah, of course," Cosima urged her, perking up more attentively.

"What do you think about the south of France?"

*

"Alright, _Dr._ Niehaus, how shall we mark this occasion?" Delphine asked, tilting her flute of champagne in Cosima's direction.

Cosima swirled her own flute between her fingers. "How about a puppy?"

Delphine's mirth faded. Her hesitation hit Cosima immediately.

"Still no?"

It had been so long since Cosima had last raised the subject that Delphine had almost forgotten the other woman's desire to add a pet to their household.

"How about something . . . more manageable?" Delphine hedged. "Something that needs less . . . maintenance."

Cosima made a face. "Like fish?"

As the words left her mouth, Cosima seemed to hear and process them herself. Increasing interest crept into Cosima's eyes. Delphine balked. She could practically see the idea growing in Cosima's mind.

"You're thinking of a three-hundred-liter saltwater tank, aren't you?"

" _Oh my God_ , that would be _awesome_ ," Cosima crowed. "Like with fish and coral and--"

"No," Delphine vetoed.

"I think they're totally self-sustaining once you get 'em going," Cosima tried again.

"Where would we put it? And could you imagine if we moved?"

Cosima let out a soul-deep _ugh_. " _C'mon_ , Delphine, give me something!"

Delphine regarded Cosima, the edge of her glass pressed to her lips. "I didn't know you wanted a pet so badly."

Cosima fluffed at her hair, grown out nearly to shoulder length in an abundance of curls that Delphine had to repeatedly and subtly dissuade Cosima from bundling back into dreads, and shrugged. "It'd be cool."

It came out simple, casual, almost nonchalant, and for the first time Delphine contemplated Cosima's request through a different lens of consideration.

*

"A bird?"

"What would we do with a bird?"

"We could totally train a cockatoo!"

"To do what?"

"Mimic us?"

"Would we really want something else that can mimic you, considering all we've been through?"

*

"Chinchilla?"

"What?"

"One sec." A picture was pulled up. "This."

"Is it like a rabbit?"

"No, it's a rodent."

"Why don't we just get a rat, then?"

"Okay. I hear rats make great pets."

"I was kidding, chérie."

*

"Tarantula?"

"No."

"Why--"

" _No_ , Cosima."

*

"Snake?"

Delphine sighed. It held a note that made Cosima's eyes sharpen predatorily. Like she sensed weakness.

"No," Delphine said. "Snakes require--specific feeding considerations." 

"You want an herbivore?" Cosima said quickly. "A turtle?"

Delphine shook her head ruefully. "Now we're at turtles? A tortoise would be appropriate for a Darwinist, I suppose."

"Yes," Cosima agreed quickly. "Let's get a tortoise. They're hardy and probably low maintenance and, and, and--they'll live long." The last realization seemed to invigorate Cosima. "It'll live really long, if we take care of it properly."

Delphine was quiet. Cosima peered up at her earnestly.

"Maybe," Delphine allowed. Cosima grinned. Her senses detected blood in the water. Delphine bottled up a sigh.

*

"A Galapagos tortoise," Cosima said out of the blue.

"No!" Delphine exclaimed, cottoning immediately to her meaning. 

"They're the perfect tortoise for a Darwinist!" Cosima asserted.

"No," Delphine said, more calmly. "They grow too big and we don't have the space. I don't even know if it's possible to purchase one as a pet."

"It . . . might be," Cosima said.

"You've researched it," Delphine said drolly.

"I may have."

"No," Delphine repeated, steadfast. "No giant tortoises. Chérie, not only would we not have room to keep it, it would outlive us."

Cosima gazed back at her bullishly. "At least say yes to getting a tortoise."

Their eyes locked. Cosima looked at her plaintively. Delphine closed her eyes and sighed.

"Yes."

" _Yes!_ "

Cosima leapt up and launched herself practically into Delphine's lap, lips finding hers, laughing and smiling against her mouth in between kisses so that there was nothing for Delphine to do but laugh and smile along.

*

Cosima sat peering into the open carrier upon her lap. Grinning. She'd been doing so the entire transaction.

Watching her, waiting for the seller to return with paperwork, Delphine hid a smile behind a hand.

"What will you call him?" she asked softly.

Cosima raised her eyes and Delphine knew the answer before Cosima voiced it.

"Darwin. Obvs."


	3. Chapter 3

One day, surveying their home, the realization struck Delphine:

"I should have agreed to the puppy."

*

The research--the need to conduct it and the hours of thoroughly completing it--had been expected. Thus the endless internet trawling and the non-differentiable sea of tabs in Cosima's browsers. The forum conversations and exchanges. The lists of books ordered from Amazon.

The books.

The original task of amalgamating their respective literature collections had, from the first days of unboxing, diminished the spaces that had seemed so open and generous upon their walkthrough. The problem of insufficient bookshelf space was one they never quite solved. Not that Cosima ever seemed to particularly care. As they had in her own apartment, her books bred in corners in carelessly lumped piles or on desktops or tables or any other flat surface where Cosima could set down a tome. More perplexingly, they seemed to summon brethren from places unknown to Delphine, stacks growing continually in height until either she or Cosima relocated them, but not with volumes taken from the bookshelves--for a glance showed Delphine that the shelves remained relatively immaculate and orderly. 

(When Cosima had excitedly relayed the possibilities of building an enclosure for their then-hypothetical tortoise from a bookshelf, Delphine had laughed out loud. "We don't even have enough bookshelves for ourselves!" She had stopped laughing when she realized Cosima, studying pictures of existing tortoise tables, appeared to be seriously contemplating taking up woodworking. 

"But aren't these tortoise tables so cool?" Cosima gushed.

"Yes. Very cool," Delphine echoed, shaping her mouth around the slang. "And built by people who probably know how to use power tools.")

And now--

"Why is Darwin locked away in a fortress of books?" Delphine asked as she peeked into the tortoise's room.

Cosima glanced up from planting a sprig in the tortoise table--once upon a time relatively simple and which they had constructed according to instructions on the internet and the helpful advice of the home improvement store employees, but was subject to Cosima's tinkering and landscaping. "Oh, I wanted to move around some things and add some stuff without disturbing Darwin, so I took him out. But I didn't want him to wander off."

"So you surrounded him with books," Delphine observed. "Instead of . . . closing the door or getting a box or giving him a soak?"

"They were the closest thing at hand and I didn't think I would take too long," Cosima said, smoothing the substrate she had disturbed. This was, Delphine reflected, truth. Cosima routinely carted books on tortoises and tortoise care into Darwin's room and left them behind forgotten.

Delphine tilted her head. "Is that my book on autoimmune diseases? I've been looking for that. How did that get here?"

Cosima's patting slowed. "Uh. No idea?" She flashed a smile over her shoulder. "Maybe Darwin wanted to read it."

"Hm," Delphine hummed. "In that case, if Darwin wanted to read it, I guess that means he's taking after me and that's okay if he's borrowing it."

Cosima raised an eyebrow. "So he's gonna follow you into immunology and--take after me in charm and charisma?"

Delphine pointedly did not reply. A smile threatened to overtake her lips. She hid her efforts to restrain it by regarding Darwin, who was taking the opportunity of unusual imprisonment to explore and nudge around his improvised pen. Casually, she remarked, "I think Darwin is eating Darwin."

"What?" Cosima said, head whipping around to look.

"Just kidding," Delphine said cheerily. "There aren't actually any copies of Darwin there for Darwin to eat. Would he try to eat the books, do you think?" Before Cosima could answer, Delphine wiggled her fingers at them. "Have fun. Could you put my book on the desk when you're done? Thanks."

She skipped off before Cosima could eke out a "Hey!" but not so fast that she couldn't hear Cosima tell Darwin, "You totally get all your charm and looks from me, Darwin. Don't listen to your _maman_ if she tries to tell you otherwise. And evo-devo is so much cooler than immunology. I'll show you."

*

"Is it me or do we have more plants than I remember having a few months ago?" Delphine commented aloud as she cast an eye about the room and noticed fully the proliferation of green growing life that had crept into the windows and unoccupied corner spaces.

"Not just you," Cosima confirmed as she toted a watering can from pot to pot.

"Okay," Delphine said slowly. "Why do we have so many more plants?"

"Because," Cosima said without much concern, "I thought it'd be nice to spice up Darwin's diet now and again."

Delphine pressed her fingertips to her lips and nodded. "I just have one question: did you want more plants for the tortoise or did you want the tortoise to get more plants?"

"I can't have it both ways?" Cosima asked.

*

At least salad was always an option.

Delphine was woefully certain that Cosima wouldn't have eaten nearly as many greens--or varieties of greens--had there not been a lifeform in their household whose diet absolutely required the consumption of broad leafy plants and thus a steady supply of it in their stock.

But then again--

"Are you feeding Darwin the roses you got me?"

Cosima, leaning over the edge of the tortoise table with a rose petal between the fingers of one hand and the stem clutched in the other, looked up. "Just one? There are still eleven others."

The enumeration came out just a smidgen more certain as a statement than as a question. Enough to make Delphine shake her head and laugh softly to herself. "Okay. Darwin can have as many as he wants, as long as I can keep the sentiment."

Cosima grinned, all gratitude soft with affection--until a glint revealed mischief. "I love Darwin, too."

Delphine rolled her eyes. "Not the same way you love me. Not if you want to share the bed with me."

Cosima's smugness deepened. "What do you mean? How should I love you?"

Delphine considered walking away, but she pictured the shy excitement of Cosima presenting her with the roses the night before, the delight in her smile when Delphine had inhaled sharply in surprise. 

Delphine stepped into the room and approached her target with leisurely purpose, sidling almost into Cosima's body, settling a hand on one hip and then on the other when Cosima turned into her. Cosima tilted her head back, expectant, still sporting a rascal's smile.

Delphine might have broken, might have smiled back, before her lips found Cosima's in a demonstration long and slow and deep. Cosima answered contentedly, letting Delphine dictate the pass, humming low in her throat as Delphine pulled away. 

"Like that," Delphine asserted in a near whisper.

"Okay," Cosima conceded. "I don't love Darwin like that."

*

"I want to hibernate Darwin this year," Cosima announced profoundly as they settled into bed for the night, which unfortunately tended to be the time for grave announcements.

(They'd tried to set down a rule that the minute before sleep was not the time to stress out one another, but twilight and cozy intimacy combined to somehow wring confessions and news of import--or suddenly recollected reminders and tidbits--tumbling out into the pillows.)

"Okay," Delphine said hesitantly, turning onto her side to face Cosima and resettling to get comfortable. "Do you need help?"

"I'm going to start tracking the temperatures here and there to see if there are any spots cool enough that we could use, but I think I want to use the refrigerator method."

Delphine let that sink in. "You mean you're going to store Darwin in the refrigerator for a few months?"

"Maybe like twelve weeks or so, but I was thinking of using the crisper drawer, y'know? It closes and Darwin would be out of the way. Or we could get like a separate mini-fridge? But using the one we already have would mean we wouldn't have to worry about regularly aerating it."

That sounded vaguely familiar. "So he's going to be housed with the carrots?"

"We wouldn't put carrots in there while he's there," Cosima said with exasperation. "And he'd be in a box."

"We're going to keep our tortoise in the refrigerator," Delphine laid out plainly.

"Yeah."

"I guess he would be taking up the space that we would use to store his food."

Cosima shrugged. "Yeah?"

"Is this safe?"

"His species naturally hibernates for most of the year, so . . ." Cosima shook her head a bit in rolling indecision. "I mean, we'll need to take him to the vet first and make sure he checks out. He has to be completely healthy and have enough weight to sustain him for three months. Then when he's about ready to go down, we'll stop feeding him and start getting him into lower temperatures, that sort of thing. Once he's in brumation and we've got him stored away, I'll check him regularly."

Delphine caught the note of worry in her voice. "Are you sure? We don't have to hibernate him. Many owners don't hibernate their tortoises, I know that, and we provide him enough that he doesn't have to hibernate."

"It's part of his nature, though," Cosima said.

"And you've researched it," Delphine finished, sensing Cosima's desire to be urged to a conclusion. "He'll be fine."

"Yeah?" Cosima asked, voice lilting, searching.

"Yes," Delphine reassured her and peppered her nose with a peck, "I'm sure."

Something in Cosima eased at Delphine's tone. A smile split her face. Her eyes softened in the darkness of their bedroom and when she blinked a few times, Delphine thought she was settling into sleep. But then Cosima said, quietly, "Can we get a mini-fridge?"

*

" _Oh my_ \--is something--no--what?" Delphine stammered, the hand she had pressed to her heart relenting uncertainly in its pressure, before the vision before her cobbled into a picture of sense in her mind. Cosima grinned up at her, tapping Darwin's weirdly textured, brightly multi-colored--Delphine's brain struggled--shell.

"Is that a sweater?" Delphine finally managed. "Is Darwin wearing a sweater?"

"Isn't it cute?" Cosima demanded with excited insistence.

"Where did it come from?" Delphine asked, stepping closer to where Cosima and tortoise lounged on the couch to get a better look.

"Alison sent it," Cosima said.

Delphine's mind tried to locate the origin of that statement and simply gave up. "Why? How?"

Cosima smiled in a manner that carried laughter. "She sent mittens and beanies and scarves for us, too."

Delphine's head bobbed up and down, punctuating her response. "Okay. Okay. And we sent her . . . a bottle of wine? A gift basket?"

"That sounds right."

Delphine crossed her arms. Frowned. Untangled one arm. Gestured at the swaddled tortoise. "But how?"

Cosima grinned. "Alison was pretty sneaky about it. After we sent out those holiday cards last year with Darwin's picture, Gemma and Oscar asked me a bunch of questions about Darwin and tortoises. Like, for example, how big he is and how big he'll get. Alison must have been taking notes. Gotta hand it to her."

Delphine nodded, shook her head, didn't know how she wanted to react. "How did you get it on him?"

"Well, that part he didn't like," Cosima admitted, "but fashion sometimes demands sacrifice. Him pulling in all of his limbs helped, actually."

Delphine covered her mouth and peered at the tortoise with narrowed eyes. 

"It is adorable," she breathed helplessly. 

"Let's take pictures," Cosima said gleefully.

*

"I'm settling into the idea that Darwin is going to be with us for a very long time," Delphine said softly, reaching out slowly with a forefinger to not startle the tortoise in question in its tentative exploration of the coffee table under their joint supervision and in his Alison-knitted sweater. When he didn't flinch away or open his jaws expectantly, she gently stroked the top of his outstretched head and then along his shell.

"For as long as we're together, hopefully," Cosima confirmed. "If we're lucky and everything goes according to plan."

Delphine nodded.

"I mean, like, for the rest of our lives," Cosima clarified, watching her closely.

Delphine turned and met Cosima's eyes. She smiled. "Yes, Cosima. I know." She pulled away from Darwin and reached out to tap the band on Cosima's left hand with her pinky. "I married you, didn't I?"

Cosima ducked her head, considered the ring, smiled. 

After a moment, Cosima said, "But we got Darwin first."

Delphine sighed. "Sometimes the children come first. It happens."

*

It was rare, but there were events and obligations that separated them, that took one of them away and left one of them behind, leaving one half of the bed cold and the mornings and evenings preternaturally still and silent throughout the forlorn and unoccupied rooms.

Only these days there was Darwin, needing to be watered and fed, sometimes needing a soak or some housecleaning for his tortoise table. He wasn't a creature formed for cuddling with humans and perhaps a part of Delphine longed for that the days when Cosima's absence crept into every crevice. But there were times when she stood by his table where Cosima so often stood, watched him as Cosima so often watched, smiled as she knew Cosima smiled as Darwin went about the task of living, an endeavor that they had chosen to link to theirs, day by day, promising year to year, when Delphine felt the echo of Cosima's presence and an understanding of the woman who could maintain a tortoise's habitat in a regular state of comfort and order though she herself could rarely keep her clothes contained to the drawers and closet.

She recognized all over again why she had fallen.

The insight reassured Delphine she had every reason to cling.

*

Cosima noticed Delphine first as she pulled up and parked the car. She disembarked from the driver side with a smile that hovered between pleased to see Delphine and puzzled to find her outside sitting on the stoop, especially without a cigarette dangling between her fingers or her lips. (Though Delphine had pretty much stopped smoking, it was an associated image Cosima could never quite shake.) Delphine smiled back, more assured in her pleasure, and raised her chin to indicate the presence of another companion.

Looking more baffled, Cosima followed her line of sight and then smiled at the form trumping through the grass. "You brought Darwin outside?"

"It's such a beautiful day, I thought he should enjoy what's left of the sunshine."

Cosima grinned and crossed sidewalk and patch of lawn to join Delphine on the stoop. Upon reaching her wife, Cosima leaned down to receive a hug, kiss, and murmured greeting, then set her bags down off to the side and settled herself next to Delphine, scooting close so that their thighs touched. 

Normally they would have asked about one another's day, exchanged anecdotes about random events or the doings and gossip of colleagues, and discussed any joint business that needed addressing. But the breeze played light through their hair and the leaves and the grass, the sun sent down its light slanted and orangey, the heat settled upon their skin gentler and cooling, and the air held its breath quiet but for a chatter of bird call here and there, the rustling of all the green. 

Cosima stole Delphine's hand and rested it caught between both of hers upon her lap. Delphine glanced over, unconcerned, smiling, and leaned her weight into Cosima, who pressed back, shoulder to shoulder. 

Cosima took a deep breath and Delphine simply felt and listened to her breathe.

When Cosima spoke, it came out reluctant, hesitant to break the peace. "What do you think about getting a bigger place? One with a yard where we could build Darwin an outdoor pen. And, like, plant a garden. Someplace we could fit all our stuff and . . . and expand. We're settled now."

Delphine didn't budge. She had, actually, expected Cosima to raise the suggestion much sooner. Hearing it asked now, she gazed ahead, not at Cosima, and watched Darwin terrorize a dandelion.

Delphine smiled. Said softly, "I should have agreed to the puppy."

Cosima, studying Delphine's expression, hazarded a smile. "You still can."

Delphine straightened up and turned a glare of disapproval on Cosima. "Oh no. No puppies."

"A new pet per place," Cosima teased her.

"Don't say that," Delphine scolded her.

Cosima laughed and patted Delphine's captured hand. "Okay, okay. No puppies. If we got one, it would be harder to go to Europe for a month anyway. We couldn't just put a dog in cold storage hibernation and take off."

"True," Delphine agreed, biting off a chuckle. "Though we still need to find a house-sitter to water all the plants while we're gone. And maybe check on Darwin."

Cosima nodded. "And finding a bigger place?"

"I'm surprised you didn't ask sooner," Delphine admitted by way of answer.

"So . . . yes?" Cosima said.

"Yes," Delphine said softly, "we can start looking."

Cosima smiled and raised Delphine's hand to her lips, pressing a kiss to the back of it. "Thank you."

Delphine looked into Cosima's eyes, brimming with the mix of stubborn passion and compassion that would always pull her back, that would always tempt her to relent, and mitigated the space between them to claim a proper kiss. "You're welcome."

*

The band twisted round and round Cosima's ring finger as she nudged it with her thumb. Her eyes were directed at real estate listings, but their fixed position told Delphine that she wasn't reading any of the text on the screen. When Cosima raised her head and turned to Delphine beside her on the couch, Delphine was waiting for her.

"Do we want, like, a really big place? Like lots of extra rooms?"

Delphine canted her head in question.

"Like, I mean, we've never really talked about, y'know, kids. I know there was that whole period of me being sick, and then the time I needed to recover afterward, and us wanting to make sure that there wouldn't be a relapse or some new health problem or legal bind or repercussion, and then we were all over the place trying to figure out our next steps so that--" Cosima paused to take a breath. "We never really talked about it. About kids."

Delphine nodded to indicate that she was absorbing Cosima's words. She covered her mouth, rolled in her lips to wet them, stared at a spot just to the right of Cosima.

"Honestly?" Delphine said after a minute. "Seeing how we were doing with Darwin, I wasn't sure it was a topic we wanted to discuss."

Cosima's face scrunched in abject confusion. It was a bit unfortunately adorable.

"So . . ." Cosima said carefully at long last, "no, you don't want kids? Yes, you do?"

"How about," Delphine said softly, "I'm not sure right at this moment, but yes, I think we are ready to discuss it."

Cosima nodded. "Okay. Are we going to talk about it right now?"

"Are we?"

Cosima's jaw flexed from side to side behind lips pressed tightly together. She eyed Delphine dubiously. "What do you mean by 'how we were doing with Darwin'?"

Delphine smiled, tamping down a laugh, and wrapped an arm around Cosima's shoulders. "That I didn't know if you were content to raise him as an only child." She pressed her forehead to Cosima's and nuzzled her gently, voice dropping hushed, sincere. "That I don't know if you know that you would be a good mother."

Cosima flushed. "Yeah?"

Delphine nodded, maintaining contact. "Yes." She inhaled deeply. "But I will not raise children with you unless you learn to pick up your things."

"Seriously?" Cosima protested, self-consciousness fleeing. "Darwin doesn't mind."

"Hm, well, yes," Delphine muttered. "Like I said, seeing how we were doing with Darwin, I wasn't sure we wanted to discuss children."

Cosima pinched her in the side. Delphine squawked and tried to scuttle away, but Cosima darted after her, the couch too short to provide escape from fingers lightning quick, too knowing, too familiar with her body, and stronger than Cosima had a right to be.

The ensuing tickle war ended almost as quickly as it started, the hard edge of Delphine's sharp _"No!"_ bringing Cosima up short. Peace was struck in the act of Delphine's arms encircling Cosima, holding her in place against her, both of them breathing hard, both of them alive, both of them healthy, and with neither sure of what exactly their next step would be. 

But there was no place either would have rather been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once upon a time I wrote a fic about a tortoise. And now it is here so that I can remind myself that I wrote a fic about a tortoise. Now you can also wonder why there is a Cophine fic about a tortoise. We may never know why.


End file.
